Marriage – is it the thing that we women aspire to have most? Research shows that the average women aspires to me married much more than the average man. But you may also be surprised to leant that 70% of divorces amongst heterosexual couples are initiated by women. Research also suggests that marriage is more beneficial to the health of men than it is to women? So why get married at all I hear you cry? Why does it seem like we as women aspire to get married more so than anything else? As someone who has been happily married, unhappily married and now happily divorced, people often find it surprising when I would say I would love to get married again. Now, I don’t see marriage as the be all and end all. But I do believe that I was too young to get married the first time, that was a starter marriage and the next one will be the one that sticks.

Eight years after I walked down the aisle and two years since it was all done and dusted, I realise now I have learned so much about myself and what I would want out of a marriage. Yes, the huge wedding is lovely and so is the idea of happily ever after but who can be happy with someone you settle for? No one. I think that women aspire to marriage more than men because that’s what society has conditioned us to want. There is so much pressure from mums and aunties to settle down that one; we do it too young and two; we settle because we don’t want to be left on the shelf at the age of whatever.

I’ll give you some advice ladies from my own personal experience. It’s great to have marriage on your vision board as one of the things you want. But what about what motivates you? What’s your gift and your purpose? Are you fully in love with yourself? Work on all these things and don’t make marriage your only goal or you will find yourself settled at 28, with the man you know you shouldn’t have settled for. Women, we can have whatever it is we want. Work on you and the rest will come – and if that includes marriage then good for you!